Saturday, November 14, 2009

Rain falls in Brooklyn

Rain falls in Brooklyn. I touched the cracked sky and a leak sprung loose. Quite inside my loft, drinking tea. Loud tricolor feather earrings that look like zebras work their way through my fingertips. Hot pink, yellow, bright blue. A prism of ideas cracking and sharply falling, like icicles, within my reach.

Blue antique lace, pale and beautiful like an antique child, resting on a red dress form. Colored like scarlet veins in love. Dreams and ideals paint my eyelids when they flutter shut. Plunging forward I take a breath in. It chokes me and I cough backwards. Some shy and shrink in my shine, and it hurts me, but not as much as the love that I feel when I create. I don't try to shrink others. I just want to touch other peoples things. I only want to create using my own hands.

Blind, thirsty, I try and ignore the shrinking violets who I adore, and let go of all ambitions other then those of antiqued children and beautiful tricolor icicles. I draw pictures and paint with pastel feathers as I reach forward, grasping at that prism of rainbows that I know exists somewhere between these silvery drops. Licking down that red dress form, to kiss a child on the cheek, like antique teardrops.

Rain continues to fall in Brooklyn. It is quite today.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Tales of a Cuntastic Halloween in the City

"I'm a Giant Bloody Cunt!" was my popular phrase on the eve of Halloween, 2009; my third Halloween enjoying the festivities in my darling NYC.

As you may guess, most called it disgusting. Many were even full blown repulsed by my costume this year. Lot's of people said that it was "pretty and disgusting" at the same time. I got "Ew. Brilliant, but ew" (i liked that one, found it very amusing). Of course the ever so popular "you're insane" popped up here and there among friends and relatives. My father even answered the phone "Hey ya giant bloody cunt!" the week following Halloween when I called him.


My interpretation of Halloween a la the Giant Bloody Cunt? Don't really know that I have one specific approach. It's a costume I have been wanting to create for years, and really enjoyed wearing and making (although during the making process I really did feel like a lunatic). I could take the gnarly feminine cycle approach. "It's just part of being a woman. It's what our bodies do. I wanted to represent the beauty of that through my costume." Another more slightly irritating representation-pissing off separatists from the four corners of the earth-could be that I'm making a feminist statement in owning the word cunt by dressing up as one. There is some truth in this one I guess, though I hate to admit it. It just amuses me how all those old feminists find the use of the "C" word so offensive, especially coming from the mouth of a young seasoned female artist, such as myself.

In all truth it was just my art. There was no major political statement in my dressing up in a gown I made out of tampons and maxipads. I did it because I found the entire concept hysterical... and even more so then that I found the way people reacted when I told them about the concept even more hysterical. I thought it most appropriate to test the waters. I like provoking reactions of shock. Especially when I can shock the not so-easily-shocked types... which I did (big pat to self on back). So maybe art for the sheer purpose of shock value is ridiculous, and I know many who find it offensive. That being said, I think a nice dose of shock value from time to time does the body good. It keeps people on their feet. I wouldn't want anyone to get to comfortable with mainstream store bought Halloween costumes.

The gown was made out of white silk georgette. It had an asymmetrical hem and a wild tulle skirt (also originally white). I draped the body of the white gown, and wove shredded white silk along the hemline, over the shoulders, down the bust, and along the waist. I sewed panels of maxipads around the hips and waist, then woven tampons, and their various insertion devices, into the strips of white silk through the dress. At the end of it all a took the rather pristine white gown covered in feminine products (which someone even said looked like a wedding gown-pre-dying red of course), and I dipped it into a huge vat of boiling hot scarlet dye. The dying process made me feel like a lunatic... seriously, I was carrying this huge gown covered in dark red dripping pads and tampons around my loft, trying to find the best place to dry it. Thought that I was gonna end up in a loony bin.


Anyways, Halloween eve I accessorized the tampon earrings and a tampon bracelet. I made a nice little bow for my hair out of maxipads. It was very Minny Mouse-esque if I may say so myself. Did the lips in bright red, white eyes with black liquid wing tipping along the lashes. The makeup really was very classic, Betty Paige pin up of me.

The evening started with a young cute musician boy, a friend of a friend, being so repulsed at my costume (while we were getting ready at friends house) he could barely even look at it. After I was dressed and we hit the streets I think the "period details" seemed rather suttle (if that is possible), and many just viewed me as another bloody girl in a sea of costumes. A cute little Japanese girl wearing Couch shoes and carrying a Gucci bag stopped me on the train to tell me how great I looked. Another woman at a party asked for my card, totally disturbed by what I was wearing, and emailed me the next week to tell me how beautiful she thought my designs where. I met a cute little gay boy in a rather generic super hero costume with a "C" on the chesy at the deli, who stopped me to tell me how great my costume was. When I told him what i was he replied "Oh fantastic! I'm Captain Cum Squirt!"

My favorite moment of the evening, by far, was the doorman incident. Some friends and I were attending a Halloween party in one of those really fancy buildings in Manhattan with a doorman and a bellboy. As we walked through the lobby, giggling and already slightly buzzed, a maxipad, drenched in red dye, fell from my dress. The doorman, seeing it and thinking it was something important, ran and picked it up, chasing me and calling "Miss! Excuse me, miss! You dropped something!" I realized I was the "miss" he was referring to as I entered an elevator full of people. I turned and he handed it to me. As I took it from him I think it dawned on him what it was, and an expression of absolute horror came across his face. Poor guy. Here he though he was doing me a favor by picking up my dropped check book or makeup case.

So yes, the Halloween costume scenario this year was a success. Don't know how I'm gonna top that one next year. Luckily I have 11 and 1/2 months for planning.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Interview with me in Above the Fray...

Woohoo!!! Above the Fray interview is up, along with fantastic photo spread from the talented Mikey Pozarik. Check it out when you have a chance!

Find the article and full photoshoot at: